英語故事大全初中

❶ 初中英語小故事

The Princess & the Pea
Once upon a time there lived a handsome Prince Jake.He liked playing and singing
and liked eating cake.
One day,his mum told him to sort out his life."My son,"said Queen Bella,"we must find you a wife!"
So,day after day,the Queen asked to tea all the princesses for her son to see.
Click on the princesses to send them away!
"I don"t want to marry any of them!"declared Prince Jake."I want to marry a real princess,and these are all fake!"
"Oh dear,"said Queen Bella,"What shall I do?I simply must find the right wife for you!"
so,the Prince and the Queen thought of a test.They made a bed on which the princess could rest.
Said the Prince,"if she can not feel this one little pea.She is no real princess and no pride to be!"
Click on the bed to pile the mattressess on top of the pea.
One stormy night,the was a knock at the door.A young lady stood there,wet,tired and footsore.
"You poor young thing!"Queen Bella said."Come in and rest your weary head!"
"Did you sleep well?"asked the Prince Jake the next day."No!"she said,"and my name is Fizz by the way."
"Oh dear.what was wrong?"asked the Prince in a tizz."There was a terrible bump in the bed,"replied Fizz.
"I just couldn"t sleep a wink all night long.I tossed and I turned.but the bed felt all wrong."
"Oh this princess is no fake!"cried Prince Jake.
"Only a real princess could feel one little pea! oh please,Pincess Fizz,will you marry me?"
So,after a feast of joy and great laughter.They lived,we are told,happily ever after!
Click on Jake and Fizz to see the confetti fly!

公主和豌豆
從前有一個英俊的王子傑克。他喜歡玩耍、唱歌和吃蛋糕。
一天，他的媽媽告訴他要挑選一下自己的生活。「我的兒子，」貝勒女王說，「我們必須給你找到一個妻子！」
所以，一天又一天，女王將所有的公主夠叫來喝茶來讓他的兒子看看。
（點擊公主將他們送走。）
「我不想和他們中的任何人結婚！」傑克王子宣布，「我想和一個真正的公主結婚，這些都是假的！」
「哦，親愛的，」貝勒女王說，「我怎麼做才好呢？我僅僅是必須給你找個合適的妻子！」
所以，王子和女王想出了一個測試方法。他們做了一個可以供給公主休息的床。
王子說，「如果她不能感覺到這個小豌豆。她就不是真正的公主，也就不能成為（我的）新娘！」
（點擊床將床墊放到豌豆上）
一個暴風雨晚上，有人敲門。一個年輕的女士站在那裡，渾身淋透，疲憊不堪，腳也受傷了。

「可憐的孩子！」貝克女王說。「進來休息一下吧！」
「你休息得好嗎？」第二天王子問。「不好！」她說，「順便說一下，我的名字是菲絲。」
「哦，親愛的。有什麼不對勁嗎？」王子興奮地問。「床上有個可怕的突起。」菲絲回答。
「一整夜我都沒有睡著。我翻來覆去。床一點都不對勁。」
「哦，這個公主是真的！」貝克王子喊。
「只有真正的公主才能感覺到一個小豌豆！哦，菲絲公主，你可以嫁給我嗎？」
所以，一場充滿愉快和歡笑的宴會過後。我們知道，他們生活得很快樂！
（點擊貝克和菲絲看看糖果飛出來。）

❷ 求初中英語故事

（一）In The Air
Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy(吝嗇) and hated spending money. One day a fair(集市) came to the nearby town.
「』s go to the fair, Matt,」 his wife said, 「We haven』t been anywhere for a long time.」
Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, 「All right, but I』m not going to spend much money. We』ll look at things, but we won』t buy anything.」
They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt』s wife wanted to buy ,but he would not let her spend any money.
Then , in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.
「Fun flight!」 the notice said, 「$10 for 10 minutes.」
Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn』t want to have to pay for his wife, as well.
「I』ve only got $10,」 he told the pilot. ( 飛行員). 「Can my wife come with me for free?」 The pilot wasn』t selling many tickets, so he said , 「I』ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn』t scream or shout, she can have a free flight.」
Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.
The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.
When the plane landed , the pilot said, 「O.K. your wife didn』t make a sound . She can have her ride free.」
「Thank you,」 Matt said. 「it wasn』t easy for her, you know , especi ally (尤其 ) when she fell out.」
賞析：誇張是指藉助藝術想像，以現實生活為基礎，抓住描寫對象的某些特徵加以誇張，以突出事物本質。誇張的修辭手法往往能造成幽默的效果。這種修辭手法在我國的相聲段子裡面非常普遍，在外國的幽默故事中也隨處可見。
這則幽默就是用誇張的手法諷刺了一位極其吝嗇的男人。吝嗇鬼在世界文學作品中並不少見，中國古有多點了一根燈草就不能安然死去的嚴監生，外國有臨死前瞪著發金光的眼睛想奪取金色十字架的葛朗台。
吝嗇是落後的生活方式、不健康的封建思想在人腦海中的根深蒂固。它不獨存在於哪個制度，哪個社會。即便在享受現代物質文明----乘飛機旅行的今天，我們的主人公麥棟夫婦，為了那可憐的10美元，也會置生命安全於不顧，「寧死不叫」。他們的這種小氣跟他們所享受的現代文明形成了極大的一個反差。
作者在文章的最後運用了誇張的修辭手法「it wasn』t easy for her , you know ,especially when she fell out」.一切顯得那樣的不盡情理，一切又似乎是那樣的合情合理：一旦一個社會的精神文明不能趕上他的物質文明時，就有可能會產生一些變態的東西。
讀之此，我們就不難體會我們國家為何一再強調兩個文明一起抓了

❸ 英語經典故事,要很長，是初中的。

灰姑娘 Cinderella

Long ago, in a land far away, there lived a beautiful young girl.
She was very sad. Her mother had died and her father had married again. His new wife had two ugly daughters, Esmerelda and Griselda
Soon after, her father also died and life immediately changed for the girl．
"You will be our servant, "said her stepmother. "You will do everything we say."
"You must sleep in the kitchens, by the fire," said the stepsisters．
After tending the fire, and cooking and leaning, the girl's clothes were very dirty. She was called to clear away dishes.
"There are cinders all over your clothes!" exclaimed the stepmother. "Cinders for Cinderella. That's your new name. Clear these things away, Cinderella."
"Cinderella! Cinderella!" sang Esmerelda and Griselda. "Oh, how clever you are, Mama!"
Cinderella had to work very hard, as all the other servants were dismissed．
One day, an invitation arrived from the palace.
"Girls, listen to this," said the stepmother. Cinderella was serving the breakfast. She listened as her stepmother read the invitation.
"The King is having a ball," she said, excitedly. "He is looking for a wife for the Prince! Oh, my dears, this is wonderful. He will probably choose one of you, but it will be such a hard choice to make.
"Am I invited too, stepmother?" asked Cinderella.
"You! Certainly not!" exclaimed her stepmother. "The thought of such a thing. A scruffy servant going to a ball, when only beautiful ladies are invited!"
"Hah! Hah!" laughed the stepsisters. "Beautiful! That doesn't include you, Cinderella!"
"You may help my two lovely girls to get ready," said her stepmother.
"Oh," said Cinderella, sadly.
"We shall all have new dresses, girls, and we shall go shopping today. Clear away these things, Cinderella."
'Oh, I wish I could go to the ball,' thought Cinderella.
The day of the ball arrived and the whole day was spent preparing Esmerelda and Griselda. Cinderella did her best to make the sisters look pretty, but it was an impossible task.
Finally, the coach arrived to collect the girls and their mother.
Cinderella was very tired and she wandered back to the kitchens.
"Oh, I did so want to go," she sighed as she sat down by the fire.
"What's to stop you?" asked a voice.
"Who's that?" asked Cinderella, looking around.
"I'm here by the door." A strange woman walked up to Cinderella. "I heard you the other day, wishing you could go to the ball. Well, the ball is this evening, and you're going."
"But how?" asked Cinderella. "What can you do?"
"Anything I want to," said the woman. "I'm your fairy godmother, and I'm here to send you to the ball.
She sat down.
"Come now," she said. "Dry those tears. We have work to do. I need a large pumpkin, two rats, two mice and a frog. Can you find these?"
"Yes," said Cinderella, mystified by the request.
"Off you go, then."
When Cinderella found all the things, her fairy godmother took them all outside.
"Now for the magic," she said. She waved her hands and the air began to twinkle and sparkle. The pumpkin began to grow and change, until standing there was a glittering coach.
The mice changed into two fine footmen, the frog into the driver, and the rats into two beautiful horses to pull the coach.
Cinderella clapped her hands. "It's beautiful!" she cried.
"In you get," said her fairy godmother.
"But I can't go like this," said Cinderella.
"Like what?" asked the fairy godmother. "You look lovely to me."
Cinderella looked at herself. While the magic had been working on the pumpkin, it had also been working on her. Instead of her ragged dress she wore a beautiful ball gown, with glass slippers on her feet.
"Oh, fairy godmother," said Cinderella. "It's lovely. How can I thank you?"
"By going to the ball," said the fairy godmother. "Off you go, but remember, the magic stops working at midnight. Everything will change back then. Now go and enjoy yourself."
"Good-bye, fairy godmother," called Cinderella, as the coach swept off.
Cinderella arrived at the palace and walked into the ballroom. Everyone stopped and stared.
"Who is she?" people asked, including her stepmother and stepsisters.
The Prince saw her, and had eyes for no one else for the rest of the evening. Cinderella danced only with the Prince, and as the evening passed, he fell in love with her.
A clock chiming reminded Cinderella of her fairy godmother's warning. 'It must be eleven o'clock,' she thought, but she asked the Prince. "What time is it?"
"Almost midnight," he answered.
"Oh, no!" cried Cinderella. "I must go!"
"You can't. Not now," said the Prince.
"I must." And Cinderella swept out of the room, and ran out of the palace. As she ran, the clock finished chiming. Cinderella's clothes changed back into rags, and the coach and horses were nowhere to be seen.
The Prince tried to follow, but he couldn't catch up. When he reached the door, all he found was one glass slipper. He ran to the main gate.
"Was a beautiful girl just driven out of here?" he asked the guard.
"No, your Highness. I've only seen a scruffy servant girl," the guard answered.
"I've lost her," said the Prince, and he returned sadly to the palace.
The next morning, Cinderella's stepmother and stepsisters were talking about the ball.
"Did you see the Prince, once that girl arrived." said Esmerelda. "He wouldn't look at anybody else. And it was my turn to dance with him."
"Never mind, my dear," said her mother. "She disappeared, so there will probably be another ball, and then you will be chosen."
The Prince meanwhile decided to look for the mysterious girl he had fallen in love with. He issued a proclamation. "Whoever the glass shoe fits, shall be wife to the Prince."
The Prince and his footman went from house to house of all the ladies invited to the ball.
First to the princesses, and then to the chesses, and finally to all the ladies.
He finally arrived at the stepmother's house.
"It's my shoe!" cried Esmerelda, trying desperately to pull the shoe on.
"Please, miss!" said the footman. "Your foot is too big. you will break the slipper."
Griselda tried the shoe, but her toes were far too long.
"Is there anyone else?" asked the Prince.
"There's only Cinderella, the maid," said the stepmother. "But she wasn't even at the ball."
"All the ladies in the kingdom must try the slipper," said the footman.
Cinderella was called from the kitchen. Esmerelda and Griselda laughed when they saw how dirty she was. But their laughter turned to tears when they saw Cinderella's foot slide easily into the slipper.
"Oh!" they cried. "It fits!"
The Prince looked at Cinderella and realised that she was the girl that he had fallen in love with.
Cinderella took the other slipper from her pocket and put it on.
The Prince was delighted to have found her, and on a bright sunny day, he and Cinderella were married. They lived happily ever after.

❹ 初中英語故事

Perfect Trade
President Clinton returns to Washington after a trip to his home state of Arkansas. He steps out of the plane carrying two pigs, one under each arm. When he reaches the bottom of the stairs, the Marine sharply salutes him as usual.

Clinton says: "I'd salute you back son, but as you can see my hands are full." The Marine replies: "Yes, sir! Mighty fine pigs, sir!" President Clinton responds: "These aren't just ordinary pigs, actually. They are pure Arkansas Razorback Pigs!!"

The Marine replies: "Yes, sir! Mighty fine Razorbacks, sir."

The President says: "I got this one for Hillary, and this one for Chelsea!"

❺ 初中英語故事

A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat is the bushes conquest. A few small mouse was afraid, but not afraid, mother mouse instead of calm mother mouse barked: "woof, woof, woof," cat listened very afraid, and ran away. Mother mouse turned to her babies and said: "you if you don't learn a foreign language, now that you know the value of a second language?"
漢語：一隻母老鼠帶著孩子出來散步，突然她看見一隻貓正在灌木叢中虎視耽耽。幾只小老鼠很害怕，但是，母老鼠並沒有害怕反而很鎮定的 母老鼠向著貓叫道：「汪，汪，汪」，貓聽了非常害怕，拚命跑走了。 母老鼠回過頭洋洋自得的對孩子說：「教你學外語你不學，現在你知道外語的重要性了吧？」

❻ 誰能提供幾篇適合初中生看的英語幽默小故事謝謝

He Won

Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

他贏了
湯姆：約翰尼，你小弟弟好嗎？
約翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了傷。
湯姆：真糟糕，怎麼回事兒？
約翰尼：我們做游戲，看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠，他贏了。

I Have His Ear in My Pocket

Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."

他的耳朵在我衣兜里

伊凡鼻子流著血回到家裡。他媽媽問，「發生了什麼事？」
「一個男孩咬了我一口，」伊凡說。
「再見到他你能認出來嗎？」媽媽問。
「他走到哪裡我都能認出他，」伊凡說。「他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。」

A Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」

Drunk

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

醉酒

一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：「爸爸，『醉』字是什麼意思？」 「唔，孩子，」父親回答說，「你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那麼我就算醉了。」 「可是，爸爸， 」孩子說，「那兒只有一個警察呀！」

Hospitality

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.

好客

由於客人在吃蘋果餡餅時，家裡沒有乳酪了，於是女主人向大家表示歉意。這家的小男孩悄悄地離開了屋子。過了一會兒，他拿著一片乳酪回到房間，把乳酪放在客人的盤子里。 客人微笑著把乳酪放進嘴裡說：「孩子，你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好。你在哪裡找到的乳酪？」 「在捕鼠夾上，先生。」那小男孩說。

英語小笑話
上個星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一個老美看到就笑我說, "Do you
know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著
性, 縮寫正好是 Adidas) " 我正驚訝他怎麼反應這么快, 聯想力這么豐富時,旁邊的
一個老美幫我解圍, 他說, 有一個很著名的合唱團 Korn, 他們的招牌歌之一就是
A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,這個典故可是很多老美都耳熟
能詳的喔! 下次就換你去取笑老美了.上帝曾經答應我
Once god came up 2 me & granted me a wish. I asked 4 world peace. That's impossible, he said.

有一次上帝來到我面前答應了我一個願望。我說我要世界和平。「那是不可能的」他說。

Then I asked him 2 give u brains. He said, "Let me try world peace".

然後我請讓你變聰明。他說：「你還是讓我試試讓世界和平吧。」 1.Tom: William has asked me for a loan of five pounds. Should I be doing right in lending it to him?
Jack: Certainly.
Tom: And why?
Jack: Because otherwise he would try to borrow it from me.
湯姆：威廉向我借五英鎊。我該不該借給他？
傑克：當然應該了。
湯姆：為什麼？
傑克：否則他就該跟我借了
2.I was accompanying my husband on a business trip. He carried his portable computer with him, and the guard at the airport gate asked him to open the case. It was locked, and the man waited patiently as my embarrassed spouse struggled to remember the combination . At last he succeeded.
'Why are you so nervous?' I asked him.
'The numbers are the date of our anniversary.' my usband confessed.
我陪丈夫一起出差，他帶著他的手提式計算機。機場出口處檢查員要他打開包。他耐心的等著我那窘迫的丈夫設法回想起暗鎖的密碼。最後他終於想起來了。
「你為什麼那麼緊張呢？」我問他。
「這密碼是我們結婚紀念日。」他承認道
3.Mother: Why are you jumping up and down?
Tom: I've just taken some medicine and I forgot to shake the bottle.

媽媽：你為什麼不停地跳上跳下的？
湯姆：我剛吃完葯，可我忘了先搖動瓶子了
4.One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.
On my return, I noticed that how sty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out.'The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield.'
My husband looked up and said, 'Mom's here?'
一天晚上我開著丈夫的車去購物，回來後發現車身沾滿灰塵，於是擦洗了一陣。當我終於走進屋裡時大聲喊：「世界上最愛你的女人剛擦洗了你的車燈和擋風玻璃。」
我丈夫抬頭看了看，說：「媽媽來了？」
5.Mary was so disgusted at her husband's cigarette smoking that she complained to him one day.
'I hope that all the cigarette factories will catch fire someday.'
'Don't worry, dear. All the cigarettes will be on fire sooner or later.' He said with a smile.
瑪麗非常討厭丈夫吸煙，一天對他抱怨說：「我希望有一天所有卷煙廠都失火。」
「不用擔心，親愛的，所有的煙卷遲早都會點著的。」他笑著說。 Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」

Nest and Hair
My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.
"What kind of bird?" my sister asked.
"I didn't see the bird, ma' am, only the nest," replied the child.
"Then, can you give us a description of the nest?" my sister encouraged her .
"Well, ma'am, it just resembles your hair. "

Notes:
(1) inform v.告訴
(2) nest n.窩；巢
(3) description n.描述
(4) encourage v.鼓勵
(5) resemble v. 相似；類似

18.鳥窩與頭發
我姐姐是一位小學老師。一次一個學生告訴她說一隻鳥兒在教室外 的樹上壘了個窩。
「是什麼鳥呢？」我姐姐問她。
「我沒看到鳥兒，老師，只看到鳥窩。」那孩子回答說。
「那麼，你能給我們描述一下這個鳥巢嗎？」我姐姐鼓勵她道。
「哦，老師，就像你的頭發一樣。」

I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "

Notes:
(1) poisonous adj.有毒的
(2) Cause I've just bitten my tongue 因為我剛咬了自己的舌頭。 句中 Cause 是 Because 的縮略形式。

我剛咬破自己的舌頭
「我們有毒嗎？」一個年幼的蛇問它的母親。
「是的，親愛的，」她回答說，「你問這個干什麼？」
「因為我剛剛咬破自己的舌頭。」

A Woman Who Fell
It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, "Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?"

摔倒的女人
上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向紐約豪華中心站去趕一趟火車。接近門口，一位肥胖的中年婦女從後面沖過來，沒想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了腳，仰面滑倒了。她的慣性使她接近了我的腳。我正准備扶她，她卻自己爬了起來。她鎮定了一下，對我擠了一下眉，說道：「總是有漂亮女人拜倒在你腳下嗎？」

英語笑話（一）

Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?

A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.

猴子會和跳蚤有什麼不同呢？你可能會直接的想到它們倆是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以長跳蚤，而跳蚤身上卻不能有猴子。這個答案很有意思吧？

Q: How can you most irritate a farmer?

A: By treading on his corn?

如果你踩了農夫的玉米或是穀物，他肯定會生氣的；而如果你踩了農夫腳底的雞眼，他會更生氣。Corn既可以表示「玉米/穀物」，也有「雞眼」的意思。

Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world?

A: The snail. It carries its house on its back.

因為snail（蝸牛）的後背上總是背著一所房子，所以說蝸牛是世界上最強壯的生物是不足為奇的。你說呢？

Q: What do people do in a clock factory?

A: They make faces all day.

一看到make faces這個短語，你可千萬別以為是在鍾表廠工作的人整天都做鬼臉呀！因為除了這個意思以外，它還可以從字面上解釋為製造鍾面。

Q: How do you stop a sleepwalker from walking in his sleep?

A: Keep him awake.

怎樣才能不讓夢游者（sleepwalker）夢游（walk in his sleep）呢？最簡單的方法就是不讓他睡覺。雖然這不是治療方法，但如果讓夢游者醒著呢，他的確就不會去夢遊了。

英語笑話（二）

He is really somebody

-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.

-- He is really somebody. What does he do?

-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.

他真是一個大人物

-- 我叔叔下面有1000個人。

-- 他真是一個大人物。干什麼的？

-- 墓地守墓人。

英語笑話（三）

Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.

At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."

它們是從美國直接帶來的

一位中國老婦人在美國看望女兒回來不久，到一家市銀行存女兒送給她的美元。在銀行櫃台，銀行職員認真檢查了每一張鈔票，看是否有假。

這種做法讓老婦人很不耐煩，最後實在忍耐不住說：「相信我，先生，也請你相信這些鈔票。這都是真正的美元，它們是從美國直接帶來的。」

英語笑話（四）my little dog can't read

Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!

Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!

Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.

我的狗不識字

布朗夫人：哦，

親愛的，我把珍愛的小狗給丟了！

史密斯夫人：可是你該在報紙上登廣告啊！

布朗夫人：沒有用的，我的小狗不認識字。」

英語笑話（五）Bring me the winner

-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.

-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.

-- Well, bring me the winner then.

給我那個打贏的吧

-- 服務員，

這個龍蝦只有一隻爪。

-- 對不起，先生，這只肯定打過架了。

-- 哦， 那給我那個打贏的吧。

英語笑話（六）The mean man's party.

The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

"Why use my elbow and foot?"

"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, are you?"

吝嗇鬼請客

一個出了名的吝嗇鬼終於決定要請一次客了。他在向一個朋友解釋怎麼找到他家時說：「你上到五樓，找中間那個門，然後用你的胳膊肘按門鈴。門開了之後，再用你的腳把門推開。」

「為什麼要用我的肘和腳呢？」

「你的雙手得拿禮物啊。天哪，你總不會空著手來吧？」吝嗇鬼回答。

英語笑話（七）Advice for "Kid"

A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."

忠告「年輕者」

這里想對將要退休者提一點忠告。如果你只有65歲的話，

千萬別進退休社區。因為那裡人人都七八十歲或者八九十歲了。每當要搬東西，抬東西或者裝東西時，他們就叫喊，「讓小的干吧。」

英語笑話（八）Which woman?

One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.

On my return, I noticed that how sty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."

My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"

哪一位女人？

一天晚上我開著丈夫的車去購物，回來後發現車身沾滿灰塵，於是擦洗了一陣。當我終於走進屋裡時大聲喊：「世界上最愛你的女人剛擦洗了你的車燈和擋風玻璃。」

我丈夫抬頭看了看，說：「媽媽來了？」

英語笑話（九）The doctor lives downstairs

"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."

He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants recing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."

醫生住在樓下

「醫生」她沖進屋後大聲說道。

「我想讓你坦率地說我到底得了什麼病。」

他從頭到腳打量打量她，然後大聲說：「太太，我有三件事要對你說。第一，您的體重需要減少大約50磅；第二，如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口紅，您的美貌將會改變。第三，我是一位畫家——醫生住在樓下。」

英語笑話（十）One Engine Left

A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a r esult."

Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."

At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"

只剩一個引擎

一架747客機正在跨越大西洋時，喇叭里傳來了機長的聲音：「旅客們請注意，我們的四個引擎中有一個丟失了。但剩下的三個引擎會把我們帶到倫敦的。只是我們要因此晚到一小時 。」 過了一會兒，旅客們又聽到機長的聲音：「各位，你們猜怎麼啦？我們剛又掉了第三個引擎。但請你們相信好了。只有一個引擎我們也能飛，但要晚三個小時了。」 正在這時，一位乘客非常氣憤地說：「看在上帝的份上，如果我們再掉一個引擎，我們就要整夜都要呆在天上了。」
回答者：lovemydream - 高級經理 七級 7-5 10:08

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Logic Reasoning 邏輯推理

A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.

"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin
g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"

邏輯推理

小學四年級的教師正在給學生們上一堂邏輯課。她舉了這么一個例子：「有這樣一種情況，一個男人在河中心的船上釣魚，突然失去重心掉進了水裡。於是他開始掙扎並喊救命。他的妻子聽到了他的喊聲，知道他並不會游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。誰能告訴我這是為什麼？」 一個女生舉手答道，「是不是去取他的存款？」

[注]bank在英語中除了我們平時很熟悉的「銀行」之外，還有「河岸」的意思。

Have You Ceased Beating Your Wife？你停止打你老婆了嗎?

This story is told of a browbeating counsel，who habitually endeavored to terrorize his opponent『s witnesses．
One witness rather tended to preface his replies with lengthy explanations．
「I want『yes』or『no，』」thundered counsel．「There is no need for you to argue the point！」
「But there are some questions which cannot be answered by『yes』or『no，』」mildly responded the witness．
「There are not！」 snapped the lawyer．
「Oh，」 said the witness，「answer this then：「Have you ceased beating your wife？」

這個故事講的是一個咄咄逼人的辯護律師，他慣於盡量去恐嚇對方的證人。
有一個證人有點傾向於在回答問題之前做冗長的解釋。
「我要你回答『是』或者『不是』，」辯護律師怒喝道： 「你沒有必要就這個問題進行爭論。」
「可是有些問題無法用『是』或者『不是』來回答。」這位證人溫和地回敬他。
「不存在這樣的問題！」律師厲聲打斷他。
「噢，」證人說：「那麼請你回答這個問題：「你停止打你老婆了嗎？」

Two Birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

兩只鳥

老師： 這兒有兩只鳥，一隻是麻雀。誰能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎？

學生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

老師：請說說看。

學生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.

魚網

"你能告訴我魚網是什麼做的嗎，安？" 老師發問道。

"把許多小孔用繩子栓在一起就成了魚網了。" 小女孩回答道。

昨天夜裡我爸媽表演「混合雙打」

Teacher of Physical Ecation: Have you ever seen mixed doubles，boys？
體育老師：孩子們，你們見過男女混合雙打嗎？

Nick: Yes，sir. Quite of ten. I saw it even last night.

尼克：見過，老師，經常見。就在昨天夜裡我還見過呢！

Teacher: Please tell us some thing about it.

老師：那你給大家講講當時的情形吧。

Nick: Oh，sorry，sir. My father always says, "Domestic shame should not be published.」

尼克：啊，對不起，老師。我爸爸常說:「家醜不可外揚。」(

1．we two who and who？
咱倆誰跟誰阿

2．how are you ? how old are you?
怎麼是你，怎麼老是你？

3．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！ together up ！
你有種，我要給你點顏色瞧瞧，兄弟們，一起上！

4．as far as you go to die
有多遠，死多遠！！！！

5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!
有事起奏，無事退朝

6．you me you me
彼此彼此

7．You Give Me Stop!!
你給我站住！

8．know is know noknow is noknow
知之為知之，不知為不知…

9．WATCH SISTER
表妹

10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse』』son can make hole!!龍生龍，鳳生鳳，老鼠的兒子會打洞！

11.．I give you face you don』t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face
給你臉你不要臉，你丟臉，我翻臉

12．one car comeone car go ,two car pengpeng,people die
(車禍現場描述 )

13．heart flower angry open
心花怒放

14．go past no mistake past
走過路過，不要錯過

15．小明：I am sorry!
老外：I am sorry too!
小明：I am sorry three!
老外：What are you sorry for?
小明：I am sorry five!

16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I haveone!
要錢沒有，要命一條

17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.
我叫李老大，今年25。

18．you have two down son
你有兩下子。

19.好好學習，天天向上：
good good study,day day up!

20.people mountain people sea!
人山人海。

❼ 適合初中生閱讀的英語故事小短文

Bertrand Russell

Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love ,the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. These passions, like great winds, have blown me hither and thither, in a wayward course, over a deep ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair.
I have sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy -- ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of life for a few hours of this joy. I have sought it , next, because it relieves loneliness-- that terrible loneliness in which one shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world , into the cold unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it, finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought, and though it might seem too good for human life, this is what -- at last -- I have found.
With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much I have achieved.
Love and knowlidge , so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. But always pity brought me back to earth. Echoes of cries of pain reverberate in my heart. Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old people a hated burden to their sons, and the whole world of lonelines, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.
This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me.

我為什麼活著

羅素

三股簡單而非凡強烈的激情一直控制著我的一生：對愛的渴望，對知識的追求和對人類苦難不堪忍受的憐憫。這三股激情，象陣陣巨風，把我在痛苦的海洋的路途中吹得任意東西，變動無常，直吹到了絕望的邊緣。
我尋求愛，首先是因為它帶來了欣喜若狂之情——欣喜若狂使人如此心醉神迷，我常常願意犧牲我的全部餘生來換取幾小時這樣的歡樂。我尋求愛，其次是因為它能解除寂寞——那種可怕的寂寞，如同一個人毛發悚然地從這世界的邊緣探望令人戰栗的死氣沉沉的無底深淵。我尋求愛，最後是因為在愛的結合中我看到了聖徒們和詩人們所想像的預言中的天堂景象的神秘雛型。這就是我所尋求的東西，雖然它也許似乎是人生所難以得到的美好事物，但這就是——最後——我終於找到的東西。
我懷著同樣的激情尋求知識。我希望理解人們的心。我希望知道星星為什麼發光。我力圖領悟畢達哥拉斯的才能，他的才能使數字支配著不斷變動的事物。在這方面，我只達到了一小部分，並不很多。
愛和知識，盡其可能，遠遠地把人引向九天之上。倡憐憫總是把我帶回到地面上來。痛苦的呼號的回聲在我心裡回盪。受飢挨餓的兒童，在壓迫者折磨下受苦受難的人們，無依無靠而成為自己子女嫌惡的負擔的老人，以及整個孤苦寂寞的世界，窮困與痛苦都在嘲弄著人生，使人們不能過應有的美好生活。我渴望減輕災難禍害，但是我力不從心，我自己也在受苦。
這就是我的一生。我覺得我的一生過得很值得。如果我還有機會的話，我將樂意再度過這樣的一生。

這篇文章 是標準的英語專業四級作文範文，英語專業必備，所有的精美英文收集書中都有這一篇。

英語專業八級 ，希望能夠幫到你。

❽ 急求初中英語小故事10篇~~~

Act 1
第一幕
The Ugly Duckling Hatches
丑小鴨出殼
(A mother ck sits on many eggs.)
（鴨媽媽正在孵蛋。）
Motber Duck: Oh,I am tired.I hope these eggs hatch soon. I wnat to swim in the water.
鴨媽媽：噢，我很累。我希望這些蛋很快就能孵出小鴨子來。我想去水裡游泳。
(Crack!Crack!)
（噼啪！噼啪！）
Duckling 1: Peep,peep!Where am I?
小鴨子1：唧，唧！我在哪兒？
Duckling 2: Peep,peep!Where is Mommy?
小鴨子2：唧，唧！媽媽在哪兒？
Motber Duck: Quack,quack!Oh,my babies.I am here.
鴨媽媽：嘎，嘎！哦我的寶貝們。我在這兒。
(Finally,the last egg hatches.)
（終於，最後一個蛋也孵出小鴨子出來了。）
Ugly Duckling: Peep,peep!Mommy!
丑小鴨：唧，唧！媽媽！
Motber Duck: Oh,my!You are ont like the other cklings.you are big and ugly!
鴨媽媽：噢，天吶！你和其他小鴨子長得不一樣。你又大又難看。（The mother ck takes her cklings to the water.)
（鴨媽媽帶著她的小鴨子們下水了。）
Duckling 1: Wow!It is fun to swim in the water.
小鴨子1： 哇！在水裡游泳真好玩兒。
Ugly Duckling: Can I play with you?
丑小鴨： 我能和你們玩兒嗎？
Duckling 2: No!You are too big and ugly.We don't want to play with you.
小鴨子2： 不行！你太大太難看了。我們不想和你玩兒。
Ducklings: Go away!
小鴨子們： 走開！
(The Ugly Duckling goes to a farm.)
（丑小鴨來到一個農場。）
Ugly Duckling: Hi!Can I play with you?
丑小鴨： 嗨！我能和你們玩兒嗎？
Farm Animals: No,you can't.We don't like you.You are a big ugly ckling.Go away!
農場的動物： 不，你不能。我們不喜歡你。你是一隻又大又難看的小鴨子。走開！
Ugly Duckling: (crying)Nobody likes me!will run away.
丑小鴨： （哭著說）誰也不喜歡我！我要跑得遠遠的。Act 2
第二幕
Nobody likes the Ugly Duckling
誰都不喜歡丑小鴨
(The Ugly Duckling runs to a matsh.)
（丑小鴨跑到一片沼澤里。）
Ugly Duckling: Oh,there are big marsh cks!(to a marsh ck)I want to play with you.
丑小鴨： 哦，那兒有一群大野鴨！（對一隻大野鴨說）我想和你們玩兒。
Marsb Duck: No!You don't look like us.Look into the water.You are an ugly ckling!
野鴨： 不行！你和我們長得不一樣。對著水照照。你是一隻丑小鴨！
Ugly Duckling: (looking into the water)The marsh ck is right.I am an ugly ckling.(sighing)I am sad.
丑小鴨： （往水裡看去）野鴨是對的。我是一隻丑小鴨。（嘆了口氣）我很難過。（The Ugly Duckling runs to a house.There is a big dog.)
（丑小鴨跑到一棟房子前。那裡有一隻大狗。）
Big Dog: Growl!Who are you?
大狗： 汪！你是誰？
Ugly Duckling: Hello!I am Ugly Duckling.Can I live in this house with you?
丑小鴨： 你好！我是丑小鴨。我能和你一起住在這棟房子里嗎？
Big Dog: Growl!No,you can't.I don't want to live with an ugly ckling.
大狗： 汪！不，你不能。我不想和一隻丑小鴨住在一起。
(The Ugly Duckling runs to a pond and sees beautiful swans.)
（丑小鴨跑到一個池塘邊看到了美麗的天鵝。）
Ugly Duckling: The swans are beautiful.They are swimming in the pond.(sighing)I want to be like them.
丑小鴨： 天鵝真美呀。他們在池塘里游泳。（嘆了口氣）我想和他們一樣。Act 3
第三幕
The Ugly Duckling in winter
冬天的丑小鴨
(It is winter.The Ugly Duckling is in the pond.)
（冬天來了。丑小鴨在池塘里。）
Ugly Duckling: Oh,it is so cold.The water is frozen.I must keep swimming,or I will die.But I can't crack the ice.I can't swim.(A man sees the Ugly Duckling.)
丑小鴨： 噢，太冷了。水都結冰了。我必須不停地游泳，要不我會死的。但是我破不開冰。我沒法游泳。（一個人看見了丑小鴨。）
Man: Oh,poor ckling!You are freezing.Don't worry.I will take you to my house.It is warm there.
男人： 喔，可憐的小鴨子！你凍僵了。別擔心，我會把你帶回家。那兒很暖和。(in the man's house)
9在那個人的房子里）
Ugly Duckling: It is very warm.I can move now.
丑小鴨： 真曖和。我現在能動了。
Cbildren: (laughing)Ha-ha!You are a big and ugly ckling.We don't like you.Go away!
孩子們： （笑著說）哈哈！你是一隻又大又難看的小鴨子。我們不喜歡你。走開！
Ugly Duckling: The children are bad to me.I am tired.I will run to the marsh.
丑小鴨： 孩子們對我一點兒都不好。我好累呀。我要跑回沼澤去。
(in a cold home by the water)
（在水邊冰冷的窩里）
Ugly Duckling: It is cold here.(crying)I am alone.I am lonely.
丑小鴨： 這兒真冷呀。（哭著說）就我一個人。我很孤獨。Act 4
第四幕
The Ugly Duckling Becomes a Swan
丑小鴨變天鵝
(Soon winter is past. It is spring.)
（冬天很快過去了。春天來了。）
Ugly Duckling: Oh,it is warm.Look!The birds are singing.The sun is shining.But I am still alone.
丑小鴨： 哦，天氣暖和了。看吶！鳥兒在唱歌。太陰在照耀。可我還是一個人。
(The Ugly Duckling looks up and points at the sky.)
（丑小鴨抬起頭，望向天空。）
Ugly Duckling: There are beautiful swans flying in the sky!I want to fly like them.OK!I will try.(The Ugly Duckling runs and runs.He spreads his wings.)
丑小鴨： 美麗的天鵝在天上飛！我想像他們那樣飛。好！我要試一試。（丑小鴨跑起來。他張開了翅膀。）Ugly Duckling: Yes,yes!I can fly!(to a swan)Look at me!I am an ugly ckling.But I can fly!
丑小鴨： 噢，噢！我可以飛了！（對一隻天鵝說）看看我！我是一隻丑小鴨。但是我會飛！
Swan: Yes,you can fly.But you are not a ckling.Look into the water.You are a swan now.
天鵝： 是的，你會飛。但你不是一隻小鴨子。對著水照照。你現在是一隻天鵝了。
Ugly Duckling: waht?(The Ugly Duckling looks into the water.)
丑小鴨： 什麼？（丑小鴨往水裡看去。）
Ugly Duckling: Oh,is that me?I am not an ugly ckling any more.(happily)I am a swan!
丑小鴨： 噢，那是我嗎？我不再是一隻丑小鴨了。（高興地）我是一隻天鵝！

❾ 初中英文故事

A young boy is playing with a ball in the street.He kicks it too bard and it bresks the window of a house and falls inside.A lady comes to the window with the ball and shouts at the young boy.So the young buy runs away,but hestill wants his ball back.A few minutes later he returns and knocks at the door of the house.When the lady answers it,he says,"My father's going to come and fix your window very soon."
After a few more minutes,a man comes to the door with tods in his hand.So the lady lets the boy take his ball away.
When the man finishes fixing the window,he says to the lady,"That will cost you ten dollars."
"But aren't you the father young boy?"the woman asks."Of course not."he answers."Aren't you his mother?意思就是一小男孩踢球踢碎了人家玻璃，又想拿回球來，於是想了個辦法：騙房子女主人說他爸爸一會來修，又騙修玻璃的說他媽讓叫他修玻璃，那女人見真來修玻璃了，就把球給男孩了。等到修完收錢兩個大人才知道

❿ 急求初中英語小故事

Magic change

神奇變化

Gaga is a little ck. He is small, dirty and ugly. His friends don』t like to play with him.

One day, Gaga walked behind his friends quietly(靜悄悄地).But his friends did not want him. Gaga was very sad and ran to the river and cried loudly(大聲地)。

Just then, a big beautiful bird heard(聽見)him crying and flew down(飛下來，落下來). She said, 「Please don』t cry. Tell me, what do you want? I can help you.」

Gaga told the truth(真相). The beautiful bird said, 「OK, I can help you to become a good-looking ck.」 Then she took out a blanket and put it on the ck』s body. She said something which the little ck didn』t understand. Then she took away the blanket. There stood (站立)a good-looking ck.

Gaga was very happy. He thanked the big bird and quickly went to play with his friends.